Time to get completely real here. I am 100% over the “self-help” fad. Yes, you heard that right and yes, I am a therapist. If I have to open Instagram one more time to see the most tanned, chiselled human form perfectly perched upon a mountaintop (insert any yoga pose here) with said “self-help” mantra pasted across their ass, I may go on strike.
This is not real. Social media and society play a masterful game with our minds on many levels. Portraying the perfect family, the happy life, and the ideal reality. Let’s face it, there is a great deal of money to be made by those who diagnose and treat our fears of inadequacy. It is estimated that the self-help industry takes in ten billion dollars a year.
Some of you may be thinking, “But wait, are you not one of those who gain financially?” What sets me apart is that I will never grow from proving another person is less. From the second I meet a client, I make it a priority to reaffirm that there is actually nothing wrong with them at all.
Let’s begin right there. I am going to repeat myself once again. There is nothing wrong with you. When you are feeling overwhelmed, sad, and exhausted or defeated it is normal. Each one of those emotions are allowed and should be experienced. It does not mean there is something wrong with you that needs immediate fixing. That Instagram post you keep scrolling past of that perfect human form meditating on a beach, it is not normal. Our version of normal has been distorted. We have been put under all of this pressure to live our lives a certain way. Our latest and greatest moments are flashed across social media. Is it any wonder that when we have those days when we cannot find the motivation to even brush our teeth that we feel we are chronically depressed?

You are okay, you are normal.
You have spent a couple of days in your pajamas, sobbing while watching movies. Did you indulge in ice cream for dinner with wine as an appetizer?
You are okay, you are normal.
Society pokes their head in and begins to make those suggestions though don’t they. “We feel you aren’t getting out as often as you use to.” “You just don’t seem yourself.” Immediately we begin to question our mindset and compare ourselves to the rest of the beautiful world. We were content curled up in that fuzzy blanket having some down time. Now we have doubts about whether or not we are depressed or anxious.
Your are okay, you are normal.
Each day we become bombarded by the positive messages. CHOOSE HAPPINESS! In a perfect world, that would be wonderful. For any of us out there struggling, that is a lot of pressure. We want to be shiny, sparkly and filled with sunshine. Who wouldn’t? Unfortunately, on a difficult day, instead of just accepting that it will pass, we feel guilty and frustrated. Why can’t I just be happy? Clearly, everyone else is right? When in fact if what we saw in the media were more truthful, each of us would manage through life much easier.
You are okay, you are normal.
I say, show me your messy buns and sweat pants! Don’t be ashamed of your dishes being there the next morning. Kids having crackers and cheese because you forgot you ran out of bread? #lifehack Laundry climbing the walls? Family eating the last wrinkled grape in the fridge because you weren’t motivated to go to the store? “Mom there’s no toothpaste!” “We ran out of cat food.” Kid wearing the same socks to school for two days? Won’t kill him. 🙂 Your spouse hasn’t seen you out of your pj’s in two days? Just remind them you love them despite their snoring! ❤ Let’s start posting these photos shall we!! #reallifeselfhelp
These are the struggles people have. These are normal. These are what make us tired and exhausted and why we just need to zone out and refuel. Please just stop and take a deep breath before you convince yourself there is something truly wrong. Live your life, you are doing great.
Never be afraid to reach out if you need to. You will know when that time is.
Much love ❤