Fall is my favourite time of year. Yes, I love a great pumpkin latte, but it is more than that. My eyes fall so deeply in love with all of the bright colours. The fire red and yellow leaves. The blazing orange pumpkins. The smell of the crisp air gives my soul a calming energy. This has been exactly what my life needed to refuel.
I was faced with a decision to make in my personal life recently. I have made a few tough, life-altering choices in my life, so I should be a veteran at this. This one was different. It was different because not only would it affect one of my children, but also go against what society deems to be the norm.
Each day I meet with clients, as a therapist, and I am always telling them to make decisions in their life based on what is best for them. They will be judged and questioned at all times, but only they have to live in their world. Always do what is best for you and those who you are responsible for. Yet, here I was struggling to do the same.
Recently, I made the decision to home school my youngest child. Even as I write that sentence, I can feel my own muscles tense. Not because I feel in any way that I have made the wrong choice, but because I spent a few weeks believing I needed to defend it. I was wrong.
Those who know me, know my children are my world. I have two adult children who are very well educated. It was actually my oldest son, who is about to graduate university who gave me the most challenge regarding this choice. Education is a priority in our family; he needed to be reassured that is not changing.
My own choice to home school really is not the important piece to this blog. The list of why parents make this decision is extremely diverse. I have had children in the public education system for twenty years continuously so I have seen how much it has changed. I made the personal decision, along with my son, to offer him more than they can at this current time. I have the most respect for all teachers. I believe they have been faced with unfair challenges and my decision is no reflection on them.
The most important piece to this blog is the struggle that I have put myself through in making this decision. Reflecting back, I am shocked I took so long based on the biased I knew I would face from society as a whole. I am stronger than that. My son deserves more than that.
Yet, I am very aware of how these types of decisions are avoided every day. People will stay confined to boxes of many types because it is “easier.” Having to face all of the judgement and questions from friends, family or society as a whole is exhausting and overwhelming. It can leave you doubting your ability and your choices.
You do not need to explain anything. You do not owe that to anyone. There were key people in my son’s life who I chose to involve in this decision. I wanted them to be able to support him and me. Ultimately, I made that choice. I did not owe it to them. If you run into confrontation along that journey, let it go. They are not meant to be involved in this portion of your life. Surround yourself with those who can be loving and supportive.
Will I face those who will squish up their faces and question me when they realize my son is home schooled? Yes. Have I let all of that go? Yes. How did I move past that? By seeing the amazing transformation in my son in such a short time. I will take his constant laughter and growth over judgement any day.
Trust in your decisions. Doing what is right, will not always be easy.
Much love. ❤